| Rank | Abbreviation | Meaning |
|---|
| ***** | LOAD THE BOAT | call in senior medical staff as ass-covering exercise
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| *** | TACHYLORDYOSIS (WITH THE JUNCTIONAL JESUS) | Usually a middle-aged to older black female American with a complaint of 'lordy, lordy, lordy, lordy, lordy, lordy', occasionally with the interspersed 'Jesus' i.e. 'lordy, lordy, lordy, lordy, Jesus help me, lordy, lordy'
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| *** | EATING THE BILL | (USA) providing care for indigent patients lacking insurance i.e. 'We ate the bill on that guy.'
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| ** | RUNNING TOWARDS THE LIGHT | dying
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| * | NECTAR OF THE GODS | coffee; without which many hospital services would shut down
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| * | BLINKY THE FISH | radiologist (The 3-eyed, mutant goldfish from The Simpsons is the mascot of many radiology depts).
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| * | BUGS IN THE RUG | pubic lice
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| * | THE FISH PLANT | Gynaecology/Obstetrics Ward (from Newfoundland, where fisheries is the main industry)
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| * | MOW THE LAWN/TRIM THE HEDGE | remove a long line of sutures
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| * | WIN THE GAME (OR YAHTZEE) | to discharge all of the patients from your service, so that you have no inpatients (i.e. no ward rounds) next day.
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| * | SUCKING THE PEACE PIPE | intubated
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| * | SPIN THE PATIENT | CT scan
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| * | NOT EVEN IN THE BALL GAME | confused, senile patient
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| * | THE | The Human Element
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| * | DOING THE TWIRLY | circling the drain (about to die)
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| * | THE PROMISED LAND | private practice/final year of medical school
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| * | ROUNDING UP THE USUAL SUSPECTS | Ordering a set of tests for a given set of symptoms
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| * | BULL IN THE RING | blockage in the large intestine
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| * | ICING ON THE CAKE | lethal tumor discovered in the X-rays of a heart attack victim.
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| * | BURY THE HATCHET | accidently leave a surgical instrument inside a patient.
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| * | SENT OVER THE HEDGES | sent to radiology
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| * | SMOKE THE ANAESTHETIC CIGAR/SMOKE THE CAMEL | intubated
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| * | FIREBALLS OF THE UTICAS | fibroids of the uterus
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| * | THE | Toronto Health Economics
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| * | THE GARDEN | neurological ICU where the vegetables (coma patients) live
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